Category: the Rant Board
My feet are cold. I'm hungry. And I miss my cat. And also people make it seem like just cuz you're blind, you must also be deaf, retarded, and unable to walk. In short, I hate people.
Well, you do sit around thinking about your blind state all the time, fiddling with your cane, and reading sign language and probably somehow being very intuitive and braver than the rest of the world, because you leave your house, alone, so what else are they to think?
I'm also going deaf, not quite developmentally disabled,, and can't walk very well. LOL
It does happen sometimes, so everyone thinks we are all barby dolls, made by Matell, and come out of boxes in a factory. Personally, I came from my mother. LOL
Sarah
Hot dogs.
Oh, and socks.
People are idiots. I will shout that from the rooftops. All you can do is just hope they get a brain cell or two.
Rushing to answer the phone, bumping into the blasted wall only to get a stupid recording trying to sound like a real person being friendly. when it is really a frigging sales gimmick for car insureance when I don't even own a frigging car. Ouch!
@lalady lol that sucks. Thought I was the only one who's fallen victum to the dash for an autodial. I agree with the OP though, people do suck
Laughing.
I have to agree with the original poster. I am not going to elaborate. It has mostly been said here before. But fuck all the idiotic comments we blind folks hear every day!
Children! Honestly. I love my daughter so much, but sometimes she transforms into Regan from the Excersist, flailing around, screaming at the top of her lungs, hitting, all because she doesn't get what she wants. No creepy backwards spider scuttling though, so I guess that's something. Still though, how do people have two of these?
Agree with the original poster. We all deal with this, and some days it's enough to make you want to scream...or post to a board like this where people get it. And LOL to some of the responses to this. Thanks for the laugh. Sometimes it's either laugh or kill people, and of those two options, laughing at people's idiocy is better than prison time for killing them.
On a slow snowy morning a man needs a man servant.
I mean, every apartment should come with.
He gets you the news, brings the coffee, you understand.
Why don't I have one of these?
I agree with Shadow_Cat. However, since I've had years of experience tolerating such treatment not only by the general public but also from family members, rarely do I show my frustration for such stupidity. Life is too short to waste frustration on those who will never get it.
Amen.
I geneerally agree with you, Lalady. And I try to be careful who I show it to. Which is why there's sometimes a need for a board like this, where we can speak freely and without all the polite filters we have to use with everyone else.
hahaha, Espurr, I agree! People can be so fucking stupid little creeps. I laugh mostly cuz it's not worth getting angry at them. Like this girl literally following me at Safe Way and being like, "that's awesome!" I'm like, just because I'm walking up and down isles? wow!
a phone call: you won a trip to the Bahamas. Oh really? yeah cool! how am I gonna get there? :p I hate those scammers!
and then this other one is yelling to the top of their lungs, "I think she's blind!" seriously? I can fucking hear you!
For what it's worth, being shouted at bothers me the most. I've given up explaining that the ears work fine.
About that politeness thing, I really don't care anymore I'm to the point where I will laugh to people's face or ask them the same stupid questions back in return.
It all depends on how I'm feeling that day, and the person with whom I am dealing. but I've never been a real patient person so...
Sometimes it feels good to put an idiot in his or her place. It is true that life is too short to be constantly angry. It is also true that patience can work with ignorant people and help them be less ignorant. But it is also true that we are not little social goody two shoes machines that must always be the ones to be patient and kind. Sometimes we need to show how we feel. Even if it won't help, it can be necessary to remain sane.
people that go on about 1 particular topic
you try to have a conversation with them, but eventually it all comes back to what ever topic they are talking about
like, " i've got a puppy!. would you like to stroke the dog?"
*strokes the dog while talking about the weather, the news, music, what ever I want
them: did I tell you I've got a dog?
(yes, you did. i'm sort of stroking it?)
them: can I tell you the story of how I got the dog, why I got the dog, blah blah blah
people that won't admit they need help too
that's annoying. you offer your services to help them- they are like ohk, I don't need your help, I can manage it, 24 hours later complaining you didn't help them
Marilyn, your posts are bang on. I had one guy years ago pat me on the head and tell me how great I am. I knew it was only because I was blind and out of the house. So sad.
why does this make so many people angry? in a misguided way, the person making the comment believes he/she is being kind. educating them usually works. if not, they probably have other issues that are beyond our time and scope to assist them. it's just a small moment in time.
But if it was just one moment in time, that's one thing. It keeps happening. You're so inspirational, la la la. Once is fine, but whenever you tie your shoes? Seriously?
And on the flip side, people who, when you're talking, switch topics so suddenly as to lose the thread of the conversation. it's one thing if one topic naturally leads into another, but quite another when people just keep changing topics.
Well...this topic was pointless, I just had to complain about stuff, where that was the point of the board...
Oh, one time, at school, they had an EA there like usual, but it was a sub. And I walk up the stairs, right...well, she's like: `wow, that's amazing!` It's amazing you're qualified for this job!
Damn right it was amazing . Walking up stairs is hard.
Smile.
If I'm going to be praised for such a task, I'd rather it be for making it down the stairs since once, years ago when I was first blind, I tumbled down them. Lol.
Extremely ladified I say.
Laughing.
Speaking of tying my shoes.
My guide dog or I tend to step on my laces and unty them, then I am to lazy to stop, lean over, take a chance of being ran over by someone not looking, and ty them.
So I get people telling me they are untied or trying to ty them for me.
As if I do not know they are untied or how to ty them back.
Here is another one.
I go to the mall a lot and walk around on my own, I will go in to a shop and ask what store it is and they will ask where I am trying to go or inform me what mall I am at.
Like I did not know what mall I was at, come on... lol I just want to know what store I just stepped in to.
isn't it easier to go with the flow? all you people are so darned mad all the time. people who give me information are appreciated. since i used to live in a neighborhood where people didn't know the names of the streets or even on which one they lived, if someone offers me more information then i need, I'm very appreciative.
Amen. Sometimes I am just having a bad day and give in to negative feelings. But unless I want to live my life being negative every day, I don't make it a practice to complain about every single little thing that irritates me. I learned a long time ago that it is much more effective to choose my battles and to do it in such an organized way that I am actually an advocate to inform the public about disabilithy issues.
But we all have a need to get something off our chest once in a while. Didn't Turricane have a board up once about a terrible restaurant experience once and someone told her that her complaint was pointless and petty? Hmmm. I think she has me on ignore.
Mall travel. Nice place for getting a brisk walk in, but I also get sick of the frequent: "Where are you trying to go?" questions, when I've specifically asked what store is this? That frequently comes with a tone of panic, or a tone that sounds to me like they're thinking, you couldn't possibly intend to be in *my* store. Do these people believe we don't need to buy clothes, gifts for others, etc.?
I think complaining has its place, and there are good ways and bad ways to do it.
I get the blind-related stuff quite a bit, but if I don't get a whole ton of it in a short time, I usually shrug it off, or laugh about it/grumble about it to friends later. I try and be courteous when it's happening, unless whatever's happening is too excessive to ignore, or hits a trigger and makes me out-and-out angry. This is pretty hard to do.
For instance, if I was told which mall I was in, I'd probably say "Yup, I know, I just wasn't quite sure which store this was. I was pretty sure it was (insert store name) but I just wanted to be certain. Thanks though.".
No. If a blind person is at a mall, or store, they are absolutely lost.
Your care giver, mother, did, or someone does your shopping for you.
I mean, how are you going to know what you like, and how to put it on anyway?
Laughing.
I to don't have time to be upset. My day is good, and I'm out to enjoy myself, so allowing them that 2 minutes of wondering why my mamma let me out alone, is okay.
Laughing.
Probably need to take a step back and clarify what I said in my earlier post. I really didn't intend to imply that I'm always patient with people who show their stupidity/ignorance when talking to me just because I'm blind. Of course, sometimes I do show my irritation, but it generally doesn't change a thing. Sounding off here on the Board is a good outlet for frustration. But I still believe the best way to really bring about positive change is to get involved in the community and become an advocate to educate the general public as well as community leaders and even state officials on disability issues.
Yesterday, I went out in the cold to exchange a package of soft chocolate chip cookies for crunchy ones and pick up some croissant donuts and they were out of the croissant donuts. I was sooo mad! How dare they, after I've faithfully given that supermarket so much business not prepare for me a fresh batch of buttery, crumbly glazed delicious goodness! I pointed my key and shot the guy. That'll learn him to guide me around while having a pleasant conversation.
lol, hahaha, right Darren? I was at circle K once buying some jolly Ranchers and a bunch of other sweets. Someone walks up to my mobility instructor and asks her, "What color are your eyes?" I'm like, "hello, I'm right here, I could talk!" Then I answer casually, "they're greenish brown." :p
erm... her. not hers. meaning my eyes. oops.
That happens a lot, Pumpkaboo. People will ask my mom or someone else if I want to do something, or what I want to order at a restaurant...etc etc etc. And I'll be riiight theeeere. People are stupid!
devilish Anthony I don't ignore you any more. when I did it originally it was a mistake. yes,complaining is good at times. like many other things, if I am not careful, it can become a habit. since I grew up in the bitch and whine family, I am well aware of this.
I never stated I got upset with the people for telling me what mall I was at or asking me where I was trying to go. I think it just takes longer to answer my question and would be nice if they just tell me. I do not get angry with them...
Those who are becoming familiar with me are learning. They are also learning to come up to me and ask if I need anything rather than me having to hunt them down. I think I am training them quite well.
lol
I am just laid back.
If I get mad it will be worth my blood pressure rising.
Otherwise, forget it.
Mosquitoes suck.
Dead mosquitoes don't. So who would kill such a small thing? Laughing.
So, I was too sick to get mad, but this bothered me. And, something good is coming out of it, so it's a Grip, and a Yipe! Hahaha!
So, I called 911, cause I couldn't breath. The medics show up, and are trying to determine what all I'm facing, like disabilities. I get frustrated, reload this 40-minute demo, and use my computer to spell everything out for these guys.
So, here's the good part:
I type: "Cant See," over and over.
"You have lovision? Shake my head yes, and no, cause I'm total. "How much sight do you have?"
I shake my head to say: "None."
"So you can see?"
I couldn't reach my cane, and my oxygen was low, so Silly Sarah thinks of the most descriptive way to say: "I'm blind!" with no voice. I had to pull my right eye out, and put it back in. Finally, she gets it. Then, I point to my left, with a question on my mind, so hope it was on my face, too. "Wanna see that's fake, too?
No, Sarah could've handled it better, but I was not breathing righ, and my Oxyben was down to 92. So, Sarah's head was not working.
Anyway, the good thing out of it, is since I do get sick so much, and many times can't speak right, cause of seoizures, or something, there's more than 1 reason, I need this screen reader. There's a program I can get it through, and my social worker is going to help me, as it does have medical benefits.
However, I sure wish I could've thought of a better way to say "I'm blind." That kind freaked even the medic out. But, what was I gonna do? "How much can you see?" I kept shaking my head, and she was like the "Duh, I'm a blonde," kind of thinking. LOL
Blessings, and have a laugh!
Sarah
Oh, Sarah, I'm not a fan of the "pull out your eye" just to freak people out thing, but your story made me laugh. Sounds like a reasonable thing to do under the circumstances.
Sarah, sounds like you were using your head still. Lol. Glad you were able to freak those stupid people out.
Sorry, I failed to say that I'm very glad that you are okay now Sarah.
Turricane, two things. One, I think most of us are just using this board to vent.
But in answer to the question you asked in post 26, why we get upset. I can't speak for others, but here's my personal answer. I get upset because most of these comments I get, or actions, for that matter, are things that someone would never in their wildest dreams consider saying or doing to a sighted person. If they were said or done to someone sighted, society would generally consider the person rude, intrusive, creepy, or in the case of grabbing, even dangerous. The sighted person who was the recipient of the words or actions would be considered right to be upset, angry, or frightened. Yet when it's done to us, society thinks we need to be calm, polite, grateful, humble, because of course the person was just being kind, and that trumps any insult or potential injury done to us. In my opinion, that's BS of the highest order. I should be treated like any other person. So if a comment or action would be considered rude or out of line when done to a sighted person, it's just as rude or out of line when done to me, and I have the right to call it out as such.
Sarah, you might consider getting one of those medical bracelets that can explain your general condition. Medics look for them, and if you are conscious, you could show it and save time.
Turicane: the reason some of us get tired of being nice is the behavior is condescending and disrespectful. I've been blind my entire life, and I'm really tired of always having to be Mr. Demo for the poor thoughtless ignorant fucks who can't be bothered to treat me with the respect due any adult. I can be patient, but I will not tolerate aggressive rude or condescending behavior from anyone.
Sarah, I'm glad you're okay! Unless the blindness is contributing to the immediate medical emergency, I'd just forego trying to explain it. They can ask later!
I have gone to new doctors a few times, and don't mention blindness. But as I either have cane or dog, it's not a secret I'm trying to hide. I like to see
how long it takes them to bring it up. Obviously I'm not talking about eye doctors, here! At least once, I got through an entire appointment without discussing it, which is a breath of fresh air! *grin* Yeah, I know it eventually will go into my records with new doctors, but it's tiresome, and so commonplace to me that it doesn't seem worth talking about.
And in one case, a doctor asked me if I run into things a lot! I was kind of stunned by that, from an educated person!
ah, Good to know it was an accident, and yes, I think we all do need an outlet once in a while. But you do have a quite valid point. My family is a pretty negative one as well. Being constantly angry only hurts the person being angry in the long run.
I think there's a difference between constant angrer, and self-advocacy. I don't think I'm constantly angry. I was in my twenties, I'll admit that. Anger was the driving force for a lot of my actions, which would explain why so many of said actions were not well-thought out, and did not end with any good for me or anyone else around me. I'm actually a lot less angry now than I was in those years. What I am, however, is more confident than I was, and do a better job of standing up for myself. Self-advocacy frequently gets interpreted as anger. Which makes sense, because sometimes it's driven by anger. It's a delicate balance that every person has to find for themselves, and probably looks different for all of us, too.
Very nicely stated in that last posting. I agree completely.
I was going to say the same thing.
I got on the bus yesterday and had to go back a few seats to find an empty one.
Everyone thinks the blind people must sit in the frunt and sometimes people will move and try to force me to sit in the frunt seet.
I had a guy try to tell me I could not sit in the middle or back because my dog wouldn't fit.
I showed him when I slid my dog right under my seat and sat down just fine.
lol
When I had told him I will be fine, he got defensive and said he "was only trying to help!"
Not my first rodio cow boy!
I have found that people sometimes do not want to here you say no.
So either you let them lead you around like a herd of cattle or do what you want.
It all depends on the situation.
sometimes. I want a shirt that says, I'm blind not dumb and i'm a normal person just like you. hahaha
You could get a button made with that message on it.
You could go to braillebookstore.com and get book marks made with it and just pass them out like informational packets. lol
that shall do the trick! :p
hahaha! sarah, glad you're well now. :p
In response to the medical bracelet comment, the heck of it is, I've been trying to get one for ten years. There's a type of pill I cannot take, and it will kill me, or cause a type of muscular paralisis, that I already have some serious problems with. Problem is,
I can't get one that's going to print all that stuff, and, finding a bracelet means knowing how to access sites. Everything, almost everything, is websites, and finding one I can access, and send the information to my county program, which has several "I'm reninding you my patient needs this bracelet," letters from my doctor, is not working out. So, instead of just complaining, if anyone knows how to use windows10, or something that will go on the net, I'd love some sites.
The Zone isn't letting me get my new messages, so pqn me, and I give you my email address. That's the only way, that I can get information.
Anyway, I do really want a medical bracelet. And, but it's hard to get one that says: "Look out! This chick is really a medical basket case!" LOL
If you listed all my problems, it'd take four sheets of paper.
I never knew medical bracelets were so much of a challenge. We used to have them, because of safety reasons. I was having to testify to being hurt by someone, and the ADA recommended both us get bracelets, in case someone of the guy's family tried kidnapping us. But, the help you get as a kid, from the government, shrinks, when you turn eighteen. Some of you know, and others will learn. You got to be developmentally disabled, and on in that program, to get really good help. I was denied, because I was diagnosed at 22 not 17, and they didn't care that it was rare, and I was born with it. "You were diagnosed too late," was their excuse for my hanging in the cold, like this.
Rant over. But, that's all true.
Blessings,
Sarah
if someone is rude or condescending, they get what my kids call the constipated librarian treatment. it's hard to describe in writing. I say in my prissy voice "I assume you were not talking to me, because that remark was really not well thought through. please clarify." my other favorite one is "thank you for sharing." then i just walk off. gets the point across. I wasn't referring to those kinds of nimrods but to the general questions that people who are honestly not familiar with us ask. it is wise for us to remember rthat we are one but they are many.
something I've notices with the millennial generation. when I have said to someone say on the phone "I'm blind." they say "what do you mean?" i thought that word was pretty self explanatory. usually i say "my eyes are broke. they do not work." sometimes the response has been "oh i thought you meant you were drunk." huh?
They tend to think I'm saying I'm "blonde". Even when they actually hear the word "blind" correctly it usually takes a few minutes for it to sink in.
oh I've had that happen too often. which is funny as I have dark brown hair. when I was a kid, we'd spend about three weeks at the beach. one day my mom came running in the house and said "honey, there's a little blind girl about your age. her family moved in next door." I got allexcited until she gasped and said "I eant blond." that girl and I had fun together but it was kind a let down to know she was not blind.
iPhoone has an app called Medical ID.
Thiis app is available to emergency staff even if the phone has the security on it.
You can't say your current condition, but you can put in it information that helps them.
Just some info.
Oh no, I have no problem with genuine questions about my blindness or how I do things. I'm a curious person by nature too, so I don't mind questions. That's how people learn, and I'd much rather have them ask me than be uncomfortable. I'm patient with that kind of thing. I'm not so patient with being grabbed, or condescended to.
Hmm, I've never had blind mistaken for drunk, but I've definitely had people think I said I was blonde before. Like you Turricane, that's amusing because I too have dark brown hair.
Wayne, I think the issue is that first responders are a lot more likely to notice a bracelet than to go fishing for someone's phone in the midst of a crisis and access that app you're talking about. You want something that stands out immediately, not something they have to go hunting for.
There is some sticker or magnant you can get and stick on your frunt door and it alerts medical people you have something going on and you keep a pill bottle with paper work of the information in your freezer so it is a common area and easy to find.
Yes, true, but it is an alternative.
I want to get a bracelet, because my allergies are fatally serious, and I have a way to get it. I just need to figure out windows10, and get to a site that's accessible.
our fire department has a magnet that we can put on the fridge. it hass a place where paper is inserted that lists important tuff like allergies etc. in my purse I always have a list of thee medications I take. it's a good thing to have on hand.
oh yes, and I forgot to say earlier. it is so great to hear the questions that little kids ask me. they usually get right to the heart of blindness. such things as "is blindness boring?" "how can you pick out good fruits and vegetables?"
also they are so observant. when I came home with my new guide ddog, a little boy in our complex who is developmentally delayed saw her and said "hey that's a new dog right?" all the ighted neighbors I had said she looked like my old dog. he was the first one who got that he was different.
I just use my IPhone's health app for listing my meds and such. Comes up on the lock screen
Oh I love it when a child sees my dog in a store and tells their parent, usually their mom, that there's a dog in the store and the mom gets on to them for being a lier... Then I get the pleasure of telling the parent their child is not lying. lol
I just want to complain about men.
I mean, they are always lying, and I can't find a date to save my sex life, and well.
Damn these beast.
Ah. Feels better.
The worst thing about dealing with idiots is we have to still be nice to them. Day in and day out I deal with lazy, stupid, and ignorant fools and I just have to smile and nod so I can keep some shred of piece.
Here's one. To the person who honks at me, telling me to cross the street when there is very clearly traffic crossing in front of me, or to the people who may have been crossing unlawfully, I hope you get a big bag of coal for Christmas, and I hope that coal somehow gives you the roids. That is all.
Another thing, people need to stop calling me selfish just because I didn't let them have their way.
My city needs to fix their light on 12th and Pearl. Blind people and sighted people are tired of it not working right!
The end
the one thing that really makes me wonder what people are thinking is when people just grab me for no reason. How on earth do I handle that one? one time, I was about nine or so, and was standing in a store waiting for my mom and dad to find something. All I was doing was standing there waiting. This guy walks up to me and puts his hand on my arm and is like "can you see?" I put my hand on his wrist and pull his hand off all while saying in a firm voice, "no, can you remove your hand please?" This whole time I am hoping I don't sound as scared as I am feeling. Mom turns and goes, "is there a problem?" The man just walks off. Yes, I was holding a white cane. The first cane I ever had actually.
Punch 'em out.
yup, ask them to remove their hand or to not touch you, all while reassuring them you're fine. To post 84, you handled that very well.
Punching them out is risky if they are bigger and stronger than you are. YELL: "Take your fucking hands off me!"
I'm learning to do just that. Being nice hasn't worked for me. It just means that I cower in my room to avoid the threats and harassment.
Or if they grab you without saying anything you could start screaming and really embarrass them.